rant

p.s. on a lighter note.

i talked to my friend about goin to church with me and maybe bringing her family. she said she have to look into her work schedule. we then discussed religion and our families and i really think shes searching for the lord and doesnt know it really. she gave me the old "i dont want to get saved and go back to the way i was before" but i just pray the lord can come through and really help her and her family.

while we talked about our families, however, i realized i still have alot of bitterness toward my mother and also to the lady that gave birth to me. my mother and me never got along and i dont think we ever will. thats gonna take alot of prayer to get over but the lady that gave birth to me is another thing. my friend amanda wants to go find her and at first i was game...then i thought about it. she gave me up...why should i find her. if she wanted to know me she could have contacted me...she hasnt so why should i go out of my way to find a lady that didnt want me in her life??

just thinking. i just need to keep praying. well later!(:


p.s.s. im thinking about getting baptised...?? who knows.